I sit here 33 weeks pregnant and the panic is starting to set in, the simple act of compiling a list of all the things a small, dependent, baby bug requires is frankly overwhelming... that, and all those pesky pregnancy hormones! It's so bizarre, for so long I've been told not to plan, not to buy anything or even think about it, for fear I should curse it all and cause bad luck. Now, the total opposite, its full steam ahead, get it down, and get it done, just in case. This stark 360 once 30 weeks hit has swept me off my feet and gasping for breath (just like those dreaded three flights of stairs at home to get to my delicious bath, by the last stair I'm a panting mess), and I feel like I've had no chance to adjust. For so, so long I've tried not to think about being a mother and all the jazz that entails, just in case the worse should happen, now, well now I need to be an all out there singing, dancing mother with bells on, and I'm afraid to admit I'm not ready. It's like turning up to a job interview totally unprepared, somehow winging it and, then that dreaded realisation that all that shizzle you said, well somehow you've got to step up and prove it, and you literally don't have a clue!
So, how to change gear and shift into this new phase of pregnancy? I'm trying to take it step by step to keep my head above the water and not get dragged under. Hubby and I have agreed to buy one big thing a week, giving us seven precious days to research in depth (hiya google and any pregnant woman I can get my hands on!) That way it's manageable, and it seems very adult and clever of us to spend time on each separate purchase rather than hitting the local baby store like a panic buyer at the petrol station during a fuelling strike!
It's actually brought us a lot closer together as we contemplate the tools we need to embark on parenthood which naturally led to discussions on what kind of parents we hope we'll be, and created an organic environment for us both to let out our fears and anxieties. Every week when we plan the next item, it is a new opportunity to check in with each other not just as preggo wife, and husband but, also as prospective Mumma and Dadda, sharing our childhood experiences and how we would like to do it similarly or differently for our own little precious ball of a human.
Baby Luno with its clear layout and simple labelling has been a godsend. It really hasn't been easier to search through all the different types of our chosen item of the week and read the in-depth descriptions to make an informed decision. It feels like a safe place where I can trust all the best products for my baby are stored away awaiting my perusal when I'm ready, (they even have a gift registry to add all our chosen items in one place that we can then show family and friends). And that's the absolute key point to my blog here, it is absolutely paramount that as a new Mumma you allow yourself space and time to feel ready. That sudden transition from non-viable, don't dare to plan, to super viable and time to get your act together can be quite simply terrifying. But, just you remember you are an incredible person... you've already spent the last 30 weeks building a tiny human from scratch, if you can do that, you are worthy, you are capable and you can do this. Just, do it your way and do it when you're ready.
-Lottie
Lottie Keble-Wyatt is Baby Luno's first frequent blogger. Lottie is a pilates instructor and blogger, currently in her 33rd week of pregnancy. We can't wait to follow her journey as she takes on motherhood!
